Worshipping people

Worshipping people scoping out their work corner to corner as if it were truth, platonic ideals

When they are also just humans just people flesh and blood

And the hint of envy I feel... to have someone rever my work in the same way!

Kanye West Zadie Smith Louis CK Seinfeld Miyazaki

Creative Exercise No. 25 Dream Diary Post 9

 I had a dream where I got a $20  ticket to go to space.  It looked just like a Broadway show ticket.  I was so excited, like I couldn't wait to show everybody, but also so, so nervous.  Was I going to get claustrophobic? Was I going to get nausea? Was I going to die? I could handle Mission: Space in Disney World, would this be the same thing? I saw a rocket shoot into the sky, only to peak and nosedive into a building, with a deflated red parachute dangling behind it. They said, that would never happen to us, because we have new technology now.  They told us what life would be like at the station, how to shower, how to not touch our hair a lot, because when we cook, dust ignites, and if there's dust on our hair our hair will ignite. I remember Skyping with my mother and telling her the news, wondering if I'd wimp out at the last second.

Creative Exercise No. 21 Dream Diary Post 8

I had a dream I helped kill someone. Or I was a witness. And we were discussing how to dispose of it, how we would bury it deep in the woods and nobody would know. And I kept thinking, someone's gonna find out, someone always finds out. We could break him up into little pieces and someone will still find out.

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Creative Exercise No. 20 Dream Diary Post 7 and what I look like in themorning today

A semi-lucid dream, a group of children taught philosophy basics in the ledgers of Berenstein books in music class

 I'm still waiting to finish my film 

In the morning my hair hangs down like a worn rag, my eyes tiny slivers of olive pits swallowed and overwhelmed by the shallow slopes of chubby cheeks my mouth is thick amd grumpy 

Creative Exercise No. 19 Dream Diary Post 6

I can't shake this particular image even though it's rapidly fading.
It's this ecological pool, whatever that means.  It was this giant deep pool inside a glass greenhouse.  The borders were gray wooden slates.  The water was so cold.  I sat down, walked along the edge of the pool, looking up at the sun streaming in, the ivy hugging the glass panes.


I dreamed I bought 5 cans of Campbell's condensed chicken noodle soup.  They were old and dusty.  My brother didn't like them.

Creative Exercise No. 14 I'm 90 Percent Certain That Woody Allen Did it

And it is less to do with Dylan's brave letter and her supporters with "factual evidence" and more with everything Woody Allen presented himself.  Woody Allen damned himself.

Roman Polanski was braver fleeing the country and not saying a word.


Listen, we can say he was in the attic, wasn't in the attic till we're blue in the face.  But the most damning thing about Woody's side is the exhibition of classic abuser characteristics.  Subtly discrediting the victim while seemingly simultaneously offering pity to the victim by casting the blame on someone else.  It's not your fault, it's her fault for tricking you.  Because he knows he cannot approach Dylan's arguments head on, he seeks to create a cloud of confusion by creating a he said/ she said scenario for which there IS no evidence.  In this case, it's scorned Mia and her fury.

I don't know why anyone questions Dylan when we have the example of Soon Yi staring us straight it the face.  It doesn't matter if she was 17 or 21, this young woman was meant to see Woody as a parental/guardian type figure from a young age.  Woody boldly crossed this moral boundary, and no one sees the parallel?

Woody never answers the glaring questions straight on, and instead chooses to attack the moral fiber of Mia.

To paraphrase a couple other opinion pieces, what's more logical, that Mia was so furious with Woody "falling in love" with his stepdaughter ( I don't care if Mia and Woody weren't married) she choose to implant one of her children with a false memory of one of the gravest crimes of human nature for which she had to struggle with for 20 years and has brought up again just so Woody wouldn't win a stupid award, or that he did it?

Creative Exercise No. 13: Thoughts/Tweets that will probably never make it Part 4

1. I fucking hate bad books.  Especially by celebrity writers/comedians.  I bunch of self important works thrown together reveling in their own nuance when they're just flimsy bullshit.  Just because it has a hard cover on it and quotes from your famous acquaintances doesn't mean it's good.  NY Times Bestseller List don't mean jack.

2. What constitutes writing too much about your real life? The kind that will get you fired too much for your job? Is saying this is the second time you know the insecure lowly superior is sleeping with the ulteriorly motived employee saying too much?

3.  Whenever I see a main character in a sitcom explain away the on camera absence of a guest character, I imagine the producers like ka-ching! another dollar saved.  Unless the guest star is Matt Damon.  Then he probably is off somewhere on important business.  Making movies that are way worse than 30 Rock. Because 30 Rock is awesome.  And Matt Damon movies generally suck.

4.  Eating junk food is always a battle between the brain and the tongue.  On the one hand, I'm not that hungry.  On the other, Frito's Honey BBQ Twists are delicious.

5.  I realize I think way too much about mistakes and over-inflate their importance.  But then on the other hand, I don't think I do.  I think people genuinely are taking notes.  And being short and Asian works against that.

6. I think our society is way to body obsessed.  Well no shit, Kristy.  but like, all this "health" nonsense, is just code for wanting to be skinny

7.  Sometimes I just dream of eating and eating and eating. I could have fried chicken for days. Guacamole. Chicken nuggets. Cheeseburgers. S'mores. Baked Spinach.   But the truth is, I usually eat the first tthings and then I'm full. 

8.  Can we just pretend that didn't happen ?

9. Everytime a celebrity tweets something nice about another celebrity I think that the second celebrity has died.

10. Never believe what anybody says. The more they talk, the more they bullshit.

11. I take everything personally. 

Creative Exercise No. 12: On when strangers stop being strangers

You know when you first meet someone you have no preconceptions of the type of person they are, and you ask questions with authority, entitlement, and no fear.  You ask questions because you deserve to know the answer, you tease with a straight face because you don't give a shit if they think you're weird.
  And then you get to know them better, they become real people, and all of a sudden you care what they think.  So you feel the urge to create a safety moat around yourself, so they can't use anything against you. You start to worry about bothering them, you don't want to give them any reason to bad mouth you.

Some of these people get stuck in the acquaintance stage, some become frenemies.  And some, some you never go through that stage.  Those are the friends.

Creative Exercise No. 11 on missing people

I only miss people really badly right before they leave. The anticipation of not seeing them triggers a wave of nostalgia before the actual passage of time.

But the second they're gone, I feel nothing. Out of mind, out of sight. Of course I occasionally think about how it'd be nice to meet up again, but none of the aching sadness that truly warrants an I miss you. Is that horrible to say? I feel like a robot.

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Creative Exercise No. 9: On being a entrepreneur by necessity

Dammit I went to sleep without doing this last night.
Something quick.

Feeling preoccupied, anxious, holding my breath, like the projects that I want are not going to come to fruition.

I hate the feeling that a project's success is in the hands of someone else... But that's what collaboration is.

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