New Shop

I made a new etsy shop for my current and future collections (moving on moving up).  I realized there was a bit of a discontinuity between my items all the way up to last year and the items I'm designing now.  It's like two different eras.  Sure, the medium is part of it but I think (I hope) my tastes  have evolved a bit since 10th grade.  My core aesthetic has remained the same but it has considerably become somewhat more streamlined, focused...somewhat. Truly though, it probably is the medium, silver (maybe gold soon?), it's just so much more effective for translating brain blueprints into real-life objects.

So fruition.etsy.com will now be just be for one-offs, one of a kinds, and prototypes.
kristylin.etsy.com  will be for the new shiny stuff.
God, I feel like I'm choosing a favorite child.

I hope to (soon, very soon) move on from etsy as my main stomping ground in the internet world (moving on moving up).  I am in the process of creating a new wordpress website, which is driving me insane (granted, it's only been 2 days). Yah, wordpress is supposed to be user friendly (for a normal person).   But boy have I been spoiled by blogger, tumblr, etc.  I mean, it took me a while to get what exactly tumblr was, imagine how long it's gonna take me now that I have to copy and paste html and close tags and rewrite tags.  Hah, you thought I was gonna complain about actually *writing* html? That'd be like complaining about the arctic flooding over.  I'll be dead when it happens anyways. (I hope).

Statistics 1.0

1/13

The number of people that ask “How are you?” and actually mean it

Statistics 1.3

7/10

Number of people who state "hey I did___and I turned out fine!"  Must insert foot into mouth.

Statistics 1.2

0/1,000

Number of times that the declaratory statement "I am not a racist" is true.

Statistics 1.1

380

number of times the Virgin Mary has appeared on over-processed snackfoods

Bangs…

…the sole source of Justin Bieber’s powers.

delusion

don’t worry self, I think you’re awesome.

One of the saddest things in the world

local news groupies

Hot flash Hallucination

had a dream where a group of guidance counselors not unlike the cast of The View (minus token minority lady) was giving me a therapy session.

Having a Barbara Walters wannabe feel sorry for me was just as humiliating as I imagined.  Okay, it was a little comforting—but mostly sh*t, my dream-life sucks.

bloody conundrum

I think it’s more scary that so many people love twilight than the fact that ms. meyer wrote it.  Okay a little scary that she thought it worthy of public consumption and thinks of her character development as anything but 2-dimensional.  But it’s scarier that her editor okay-ed it, that she has an editor, that TIME magazine wrote articles on it filled with more pseudo-intellectual praise than serious critiques, that thousands of girls and MOMS ( oh, the moms) are screaming in frustrated ecstasy for Edward without the slightest hint of irony.
 Man, there’s a lot of crazy people in the world.  But maybe that’s just part of the human condition, maybe we just want to unabashedly let go of the real world (let’s blame the economy for the umpteenth time), not to think and feign sophistication but to take the plunge into maudlin sappiness (redundant? well that’s how syrupy gag-worthy it is).

But I still think it’s really really bad.  And our brains are turning to mush.  And then dear Stephenie will write about some chiseled zombie romantically sucking said brains out.

hahahaha

Now, take a look at this….

101%

From a strictly mathematical viewpoint:

What Equals 100%?
What does it mean to give
MORE than 100%?

Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%?

We have all been in situations
where someone wants you
to GIVE OVER 100%.

How about ACHIEVING 101%?

What equals 100% in life?

Here’s a little mathematical
formula that might help
answer these questions:

If:

A B C D E F G H I J K L M
N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

Is represented as:

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12
13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20
21 22 23 24 25 26.

If:

H-A-R-D-W-O- R- K

8+1+18+4+23+ 15+18+11 = 98%

And:

K-N-O-W-L-E- D-G-E

11+14+15+23+ 12+5+4+7+ 5 = 96%

But:

A-T-T-I-T-U- D-E

1+20+20+9+20+ 21+4+5 = 100%

THEN, look how far the love of God will take you:

L-O-V-E-O-F- G-O-D

12+15+22+5+15+ 6+7+15+4 = 101%

Therefore, one can
conclude with mathematical
certainty that:

While Hard Work and
Knowledge will get
you close, and Attitude will
get you there, It’s the
Love of God that will put
you over the top!
 

Dumb Nerds

If someone is really pompous about being really smart, does that make them at least a little dumb?

And is there actually a scientific way to measure book smarts vs. street smarts?

Remember when…

In high school and middle school there was always that group of “cool” and “popular” people.  You know, that group.  The guys looked like rejects from 90s boy bands (still!) and the girls had such vibrant complexions that they mimicked the color of radioactive Tropicana. Oh, and the charming personalities that matched.  Their weapon of choice were Justin Bieber smiles and their meat were Oblivious Teachers.  Man, did they have those teachers fooled, charmed.  So proud those teachers were, sooo proud.  Yeah, ‘cause they helped those special ed kids because they were “buddies.” (Side note: could there be a more condescending term of endearment?)  Of course they didn’t start firing off racial slurs the second they turned the corner into a different hallway, don’t be silly.
 But the rest of us, we always had to use scare quotes to describe the “popular” and “cool” because, well, besides their enviable hegemony,  no one really wanted to be them.  I mean, only scary people on reality tv (not real life, naw) chose to be ignorant and stooopid and the shade of orange Crayola would coin as “oompa loompa no. 7,” right?  People have BRAINS, right?

PS. When are they gonna write a plot about a high school where the protagonist isn’t the photogenic jock that’s “different” or the “secretly” pretty nerdette and that doesn’t have to be offbeat in order to be a success (Sorry Napoleon, Ghost World). Basically, a good high school movie that’s actually aimed at high schoolers and (more likely) tweens.
PPS.  Breakfast Club kinda did it.  But I want it to be Bigger.  Like Glee or HSM big. That’s what she said (to her gay boyfriend).

You are what you wear

trendy t-shirts with a cool graphic or clever saying are a major vice of mine.  I always think I'm over it (it's so hipster) and then I do something stupid like peruse american apparel and I see these perfectly nonchalant articles of clothing that would be so *suitable* announce to the world how hip I am, see all these things that interest me? Why yes, I love the Beatles, why yes I think this colorful pattern is simply marvelous, aren´t I eclectic?, Where the Wild Things Are is simply brilliant, oh yeah and so is the Cookie Monster--can't you see I'm charmingly childlike and obviously sophisticated too to have had the confidence to wear this shirt and not have it detract from your opinion of me? And God Forbid I look like I bought it last week for $29.99 at Urban Outfitters.  No no, it's supposed to look like I had this tee forEVER, it was just lying at the bottom of of my drawer along with my American Cancer Society and Greetings from Niagra Falls tees and I happen to be wearing it today because I'm doing laundry and running errands and painting the outside of my house.
***
I always think maybe just a couple...and then all of sudden I have enough to clothe the audience at a Weezer concert at UC Berkeley. Except not really, since I don't even have *one* right now.  God I have such good self-control.

I love...

...how people use their own abilities as a yardstick against which to measure other people's talents.  Really, he's talented because at least he can dance better than you? Well that's not saying much.